


Already Gone

by sorryinadvance



Series: We're More Than A Band [13]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alex Has Anxiety (Julie and The Phantoms), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Anxiety, Arguing, Caleb Covington - Freeform, Hurt Julie, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), I'm Sorry, Mild Language, Post-Season/Series 01, Stress, luke is a dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:20:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27651934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sorryinadvance/pseuds/sorryinadvance
Summary: Julie is struggling to find time for school, her family, Flynn, and everything in between as the band's popularity grows. Tension is building between her and Luke. It's only a matter of time until someone snaps and harsh words are exchanged.
Series: We're More Than A Band [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1931422
Comments: 15
Kudos: 135





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhhh, I'm not good with angst, but I wanted to try it out. I apologize in advance. Enjoy!

Despite their growing popularity in the L.A. music scene, Julie and the Phantoms were slowly becoming undone. Tension was building between all four members, and it was only a matter of time until people began to notice. Their interactions on stage became less genuine and more forced as if part of a routine they were growing sick of. The group loved music and each other, and the band was evolving into something bigger and better. They should be happy. Right?

The more shows they performed, the more it felt as if Julie was suffocating. Between school, band rehearsals, gigs, sleep, and trying to create time to be with Flynn and her family, the lead singer felt as if the world was bearing down on her shoulders. Her exhaustion could be seen in the tired set of her shoulders and dark smudges under her eyes. She had already had to reassure her father and aunt that ‘no, she was okay’ and ‘the band is too important for her and her future to give up right now.’

Her songwriting was becoming a tedious chore rather than a stress relief. Now, when she spent whatever spare time she could with Luke trying to write new material for the band, Julie felt her annoyance growing towards the ghost boy. He was so passionate and headstrong when it came to music that he seemed to forget that Julie had other obligations outside of the band. He forgot that she was a lifer with school and other responsibilities she had to maintain to keep everyone in her life happy.

Alex and Reggie were often caught in the middle when the tension made the atmosphere in the studio feel thick as Julie grew frustrated with Luke over how hard he was pushing her. The majority of the time their songwriting sessions resulted in either passive aggressive comments being tossed back and forth or full on screaming matches. Alex would grow so anxious listening to them argue that he disappeared to find Willie halfway through just to get away from the fight. Reggie would sit with his knees tucked against his chest on the couch and eyes full of tears as two of his favorite people went at each other’s throats. Sometimes he would eventually go to find Ray and find comfort in the man’s presence. Other times, the bassist sat and watched the fight unfold until one of them walked out of the studio.

After weeks of arguments and snide comments, Julie completely snapped.

Luke had been making a “harmless” comment to Alex about how some people couldn’t seem to prioritize their time and were apparently forgetting about the band’s dream to make it big as Julie rushed into the studio. She was so busy afterschool trying to beg her English teacher to let her redo a major paper that she completely bombed that Julie hadn’t realized she was running late for band practice. That one comment grated at her last bit of patience and she whirled to face the guitarist with rage in her eyes and venom on her tongue.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Luke. I was a little busy trying to save my English grade. Some of us still have to, you know, worry about school and being able to pass the tenth grade,” she snapped at him.

Luke’s smile was bitter and harsh. “Well, Jules, maybe you should get better time management skills. It seems like you’re slipping just a bit.”

“Excuse me? Are you serious right now?” She threw her backpack onto the coffee table and put her hands on her hips. Julie couldn’t believe his audacity. He knew how much she was stressing trying to stretch herself far enough to balance everything in her life.

“Yeah, I am. You think we haven’t noticed how it’s starting to seem like you hate being around us? We might be dead, but we’re not oblivious. Don’t try to treat us like a chore. You knew what you were signing up for when you joined the band. You need to start figuring out what’s important to you,” he told her.

Julie scoffed. “You’re unbelievable. I have been busting my ass trying to keep my grades up so my dad doesn’t pull the plug on the band. I have been trying to find time between schoolwork and band rehearsal and all those songwriting sessions you keep insisting on just so I can at least get a few hours of sleep. Unlike you, I still have to focus on things outside of the band.”

“Luke, give her a break,” Alex said softly.

Reggie had just popped into the garage and was immediately regretting it when he caught sight of Julie and Luke facing off once again.

“No. She needs to get her shit together or—”

“Or what?” Julie interrupted him, “Or you’re going to kick me out of the band? Good luck trying to perform for people then. Don’t forget, Luke, you _need me._ Without me, you’re just like elevator music. No one can see you.”

Luke flinched at her words. Alex and Reggie both held their breathe. Things were starting to get ugly, and neither of them knew what to do or how to stop it. Alex and Reggie had never seen him this angry. His eyes were hard. The muscles in his jaw fluttered at how hard he was clenching his teeth. Julie wasn’t any better. Her hands shook at her sides before she drew them into fists. Her eyes shone with unshed tears but her voice remained steady.

“Maybe we should have just stayed with Caleb. He knows how good we are and the people there love us. We don’t need you,” Luke spat.

“Luke, that’s enough!” Alex suddenly shouted at the other boy. It was too late. The damage was done.

Julie’s gaze fell to the floor. For a moment, the studio was dead silent. Then, she raised her eyes to meet Luke’s hazel ones. She tilted her chin and set her jaw. The tears in her eyes started to fall.

“Go ahead. Leave. I’ll just add you to the list of people who abandoned me,” Julie whispered.

“Jules, don’t,” Reggie murmured.

“He didn’t mean it,” Alex begged.

Luke stayed silent as he watched the girl. Julie held his gaze for what felt like hours before gathering her things and walking out of the studio. All three ghosts flinched as the door slammed shut behind her.


	2. You Were Never Gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I like how this came out. I wrote this so many times, and I'm kind of just giving up now. I'm sorry if it's terrible or not how you guys wanted it to turn out.

It took five minutes for Alex to scream at Luke that he was out of line and he had better get his head out of his ass to apologize to Julie. It took three minutes for Reggie to softly tell Luke that Julie was the best thing that had ever happened to them, and if Luke really wanted to go back to Caleb’s club then he would be going alone. It took one minute for Luke to realize just how badly he had screwed up and regretted his cruel words.

By then, it was too late. Julie was gone. Alex and Reggie had followed after her. He was alone.

Luke sank onto the floor of the studio and gripped his hair so tightly it began to sting. He felt like he was suffocating. The studio walls, his clothes, even the air just felt like it was grating on his skin and squeezing the life out of him all over again. The lights were too bright. The sounds of cars and children outside irritated him. Everything was just too much.

Luke struggled out of his hoodie and poofed out of the garage. He reappeared on a secluded part of the beach. He couldn’t remember the name at that moment, but he recognized his surroundings. It was far enough from the more public part of the beach that he doubted anyone would wander this far. His mind felt like it was going a thousand miles a minute. Luke jammed his fists against his eyes and a sharp cry escaped him.

Julie was the absolute last person he wanted to hurt. He didn’t even know what was going on with him the past few weeks. Luke knew he got tunnel vision when it came to music and his dream of making it big, but this was something else. He was being intentionally harsh and thick-headed with songwriting and rehearsals lately. He loved music, but his friends were so much more important to him.

How could he do that to Julie? How could he be such an asshole? He knew how much she was working to balance everything out. It was hard to not notice how tired she was looking lately and how her ethereal presence was fading into a dull light. Her passion for music was fizzling out and it was all because of him.

Luke pressed his fists harder against his eyes in hopes of ridding the thought from his head. He knew it was true, but he couldn’t bear it.

On the edges of his consciousness, he swore he heard someone calling his name. His mind was too far away to recognize the voice. His brain told him it was his mother, Alex, Julie, Reggie, his father, Bobby, or even Flynn. Suddenly all of their voices echoed his name and it felt like someone was banging on his skull like a bass drum.

Hands grabbed at his shoulders and Luke flailed. He pushed the hands away, refusing to open his eyes, and scrambled away in the sand. The hands grabbed at him again, catching the sides of his face and holding him steady.

“Luke! Hey man, are you okay? Do I need to go get Alex?” the voice asked frantically.

He recognized the voice this time. What was Willie doing here? Why would he imagine his voice?

“Dude, you aren’t imagining me. I’m here, okay? I’m here. Focus, Luke. Come back to yourself,” Willie said softly this time. “Open your eyes, Luke.”

And he did. Luke opened his eyes to see Willie’s scared face inches away from his own.

“You’re okay. You’re here. On the beach, yeah? Just take a deep breathe.”

Luke felt himself nod as he stared at the other boy. He tried to focus on the feeling of Willie’s hands on his face to bring himself back. It was grounding. It took him a few minutes, but Luke finally calmed down enough for his brain to slow down. His body wasn’t on fight or flight mode anymore and his senses calmed down.

“I’m okay. I’m good,” Luke rasped out. His voice cracked and was ridiculously scratchy from his episode, but he didn’t care. It just felt good to be in control of his own body again.

Willie released his hold on his face and sat back in the sand. Luke watched as the other boy ran a shaky hand through his long hair and watched Luke right back. Neither of them spoke.

Finally, Luke licked his lips and said, “What are you doing all the way out here? I thought you stayed by the pier?”

Willie snorted. “You know, considering what I just saw, I should be the one asking you questions. But I like to get away from lifers. They’re too much sometimes, so I like to come to the quieter parts of the beach and get away for a bit.”

Luke nodded and waited. He looked away from the other ghost and focused his gaze on the water. From the corner of his eye, he saw Willie watching him and figured it was inevitable for the blunt-spoken boy to begin asking questions.

“So, you going to tell me what happened, man?”

Luke sighed, “Yeah, uh, I was kind of a dick to Julie earlier. I said a lot of things I shouldn’t have, and now they’re all pissed at me. Including Alex. And I don’t know how to fix it. Things have just been so screwed up lately with all of us, and I know it’s pretty much all my fault.”

From his peripheral vision, Luke saw Willie nod.

“Yeah, man, Alex told me what’s been going on. You’re right. It is your fault. You’re putting way too much pressure on them and yourself, and never giving yourself a chance to just relax. You three got a second chance, and that’s something any musician would love to get. The thing is, you need to remember that you have a second chance at _life_. You need to remember that it’s okay to have a life outside of music and broaden your horizons, man. You have a girl, a lifer, who can see you, and that is something that only you three have. That’s wicked cool. Take advantage of that.”

Luke frowned at Willie. “What do you mean?”

“She can see you. When you play music with her, everyone else can see you. That’s cool, but everyone else aren’t important. You don’t have a weird, magical connection with them. You have a connection with Julie, and it looks like you’re screwing it up. Have fun with her, make memories, give her something to look back on when you—when or if _that_ day comes. You get me?”

Luke felt his shoulders slump. He thought back on the first few weeks of knowing Julie, when being a ghost was new territory, and they were getting comfortable with each other. He remembered the weekends when they would all pile on Julie’s couch and watch Friends or binge movies when they had the house to themselves. He remembered how hard Reggie could make Julie laugh, almost to the point where tears were in her eyes. He remembered how Alex’s face lit up when Julie told him all about how much the LGBTQ+ community has grown and how things have changed for gay people. He remembered how Julie’s face glowed and her smile almost split her face when they wrote songs together and complimented each other so well. Sure, they bickered and spit sly comments and sarcasm back and forth, but Julie was easily his favorite person in the world. They all built a bond together and had this little found family connection that was so much different than what they had with Bobby. Julie was the missing piece, and here Luke was just screwing all that up.

“Fuck, you’re right. I need to fix this,” he mumbled.

“Yeah, you do. Now go do it.”

Luke smirked at Willie. He hadn’t interacted with the ghost much before, aside from Caleb-related discussions, but he could see why Alex cared about him so much. Willie was a good guy. Luke would have to remember that.

“Thanks, man. Not just for the kick in the ass, but, er, for before, too,” Luke fumbled over his words as he stood from the sand.

Willie grinned up at him. “No worries. I get it. We all have our bad days. As long as you bounce back from it and come back stronger together. Slay your demons, man.”

+

When Luke got back to the Molina’s house, he popped into the hallway outside of Julie’s bedroom door. He didn’t hesitate to knock on her door and wait for a response.

“What do you want?” Julie half-heartedly asked from the other side of the door.

Luke popped his head through the wood. Julie was buried under her plethora of blankets with Alex and Reggie on either side of her. The former glared at him, while the latter gazed at him expectantly. He could barely see the top of Julie’s head and her eyes from beneath the white comforter.

“Come to yell at me some more? Or did you just want to tell me you’re going to join Caleb’s stupid band? Because if that’s the case, I don’t give a shit. Leave and don’t come back.”

Luke winced at the venom in her voice. He knew he deserved it, but it still hurt. He bounced on his toes anxiously and began fiddling with the ring on his index finger.

“Julie, I know I was a dick. I’ve been a dick to you, all of you, for weeks, and that’s not okay. I put the music and my dream before all of you, and I’m done. You three are so much more important to me than any of that. Earlier, what I said, you have to know I didn’t mean any of that. I would never go back to Caleb’s stupid club. I was just angry and an idiot. I’m so deeply sorry, Jules. I wish I could take back everything I told you.”

Julie scoffed. “You’re so full of it. The only reason you’re saying any of this is because you need me. You’re just like a dog with his tail between his legs right now.”

Luke chewed on his bottom lip. “You’re right. I am. And I do need you. Just not for what you’re thinking. Yes, people can see us when we perform together, but that’s not why I need you. Jules, you’re like sunshine. You give the people around you life and purpose. You’re sweet and gentle. You take care of your family. You’re fiercely protective of the people you love. You make me laugh and smile more than anyone else ever has. You understand me in ways no one else ever has. You are such a great friend to all of us. You’re amazing and I could never deserve to have someone like you in my life.”

“Flattery gets you nowhere, Patterson,” Julie whispered. Luke couldn’t help but notice the harsh tone was gone from her voice now. He felt hope bloom in his chest.

“I love you three so much. I can’t imagine my life without you, and I don’t even want to. That thought terrifies me. I know you’ve lost a lot of people in your life, Julie, but I don’t want to be one of those people. Please, just let me make this up to you. We can practice three days a week and less hours a day. That way you have more time for school and your family. Alex can hang out with Willie more. Reggie can hang out with Ray and you guys more. It’s a win-win for everyone, right?” Luke flushed at the way his voice began to tremble.

For a moment, no one spoke. Alex and Reggie watched him. The anger in Alex’s eyes faded into a mix of affection and exasperation. Reggie had a small smile on his face. Julie pushed the blankets down and sat up. He saw the tear stains on her face and how red her nose was from crying so clearly now it made his heart ache.

“What about you?” Julie asked. “What will you do?”

Luke hesitated. That wasn’t what he was expecting at all.

“I don’t know. Probably just hang out at my parents’ house, catch up on the music scene?,” Luke shrugged. He didn’t realize how much music ruled his life and made up ninety percent of his personality. He couldn’t even remember what he used to do for fun when he was alive.

“You’re an idiot, you know that?”

“You’re not wrong,” he said drily.

Shaking her head, Julie reached out a hand to him. “Come here.”

Luke slipped of his sneakers and sat on his legs on the edge of the bed. Julie raised an eyebrow at him but didn’t acknowledge how much distance he put between himself and them.

A beat of silence passed where no one spoke. Instead, they all just watched each other.

“Ya know what I miss? When we all used to just hang out together and the band wasn’t a huge priority. Like, yeah, it was important, but we didn’t let it dictate our lives,” Reggie said softly.

Julie glanced at Luke before focusing on Reggie. She cuddled into his shoulder and he dropped his head to lean on hers.

“Me too, Reg,” Julie whispered, “Do you guys think this is just going to get worse? If we keep going down this path, then we’re going to end up hating each other.”

Alex frowned. He was pointedly not looking at Luke when he responded to Julie. “I think if we can all talk about things rationally and not start yelling or fighting, then we should be okay. We just can’t let things build up like the way they were. That’s how things blow up and we fall apart.”

They all nodded their agreement.

Luke looked down at his lap and picked at a loose thread from his jeans. “If I start being a dick again, just tell me. I know myself. I get so focused on the end goal that I forget about everything else, and I want to change that. I do, but it’s not easy. So, could you guys help me?” he asked timidly.

“Trust me, next time you will definitely get a good talking to if things get bad again,” Alex told him.

“Or a good smack,” Julie added teasingly.

A small laugh escaped Luke’s lips. If she was teasing him again, then maybe they would be okay. The argument they had today definitely took them a few steps back, but Luke was sure he could make it up to her.

“Luke, we love you. We love how passionate and hard working you are, but sometimes you need to just relax. I think if we all did more of that, then it would be easier,” Reggie said.

“You’re right. Like I said, I want to do better. I’m just going to need a little help.”

“That’s what a family does. They help each other,” Julie said with a soft smile. “Even when one person is being a huge pain in the ass, we still find a way to help them.”

Luke couldn’t help smiling back at her.

“Now stop looking like a sad puppy and get over here, Patterson,” Alex laughed.

Reggie and Julie made grabby hands at him until he laughed and gave in. He moved to his feet and bounced on the mattress a few times. Julie’s eyes widened as she realized what he was about to do. She barely had time to pull Alex on top of her before Luke jumped and immediately fell on top of them.

Poor Alex groaned as he took the full force of Luke’s fall. Julie didn’t think her plan through because now she was stuck beneath two teenage boys. Despite being ghosts, they were heavy, and she was getting very squished right now.

Reggie apparently felt left out and threw himself on Luke’s back. Alex and Julie both groaned at the added weight.

“I hate you. I hate all of you,” Julie choked out.

“No, you don’t,” the three ghosts said smugly.

 _They were right,_ Julie thought, _but I don’t enjoy being turned into a Julie pancake._


End file.
